Awkward and Awesome Thursday!

You guys, I’m not good at blogging on a regular basis. I accept that. And I’m sorry. It’s just not easy to set aside time to sit at my computer and rehash the awful fantastic things that happened to me over the past few days. Especially when I have a 3-year-old asking to sit on my lap to watch “wideos” (we have a little issue with the letter “V”) and a 2-month-old who pretty much just cries and cries and cries. And cries. You guys. He cries allllllll the time. So no computer time for me unless it’s 2 am and I finally have some much-needed alone time. And during this precious, no, sacred time I choose between two options: sleep or Mad Men reruns. I think we can all agree that watching Netflix beats sleep every time. No wonder I’m a walking zombie. Anyway, on to the awkward. Awkward:  I was walking through Target and Luke sneezed so hard that green snot started running down his nose (life as a mom gets more and more glamorous). I rifled through my purse and only had two items suitable for nose wiping: those spare panties I told you about before, and a panty liner. To avoid embarrassing him by pulling out my giant undies, I wiped his little snotty nose with a pink, scented panty liner. I’m all about what works these days. Watching the movie Still Alice with Sean. He prefers comedies and was fast asleep within 6 minutes. Anyway, this poor lady gets Alzheimer’s disease at an early age and you watch the emotional devastation of her disease and degradation of her mental abilities. And then I started thinking. “I can’t remember where I put the keys either. And last week I left an entire bag of groceries in the car. I don’t ever remember to move the laundry from the washer to dryer before it starts to smell. What’s the word for the thing that makes water come down from the shower? I don’t even know the last time I washed my hair. Ahhhhh! Sean, wake up! I have Alzheimer’s!” Being 30 and still getting pimples. What the heck, hormones?! And even weirder is trying to decide which lotion to put on before bed: the kind for preventing pimples or the kind for preventing wrinkles. Because they exist in the same space these days. My weird bod. It still screams, “I’m not fat – I’m having a baby!” Except I already had that baby and he’s nearly 3 months old. It sure is taking a while for this weight to fall off. Isn’t that how it happens? It just falls off while you sleep and cuddle your new little babe. Waiting… Awesome: My little workout group. We exercise one day a week for about 40 minutes and then we go drink beer for a few hours. Still waiting for this weight to fall off… SUMMMMMEEEEEERRRRRRR! Even though I’m not in school and my kids aren’t in school yet (sigh) I still love that it’s summer. Now we have a legitimate reason to eat ice cream every day and just lay around in the sunshine. Still waiting, skinny body… MY NEW KITCHEN!! I’ll post pictures someday soon. Right now I’m enjoying the benefits of living in the first world again. You know, running water, refrigeration, drywall. I’m like a Queen. xox PS Here are some gratuitous pictures of my cute children. DEF_9900 DEF_9769

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